Reviewing the Situation; or, the Gin Palace is Closed.

Since Gin Circus is a duo it only works if there are two of us fully behind the band and, while I’ve not talked to Alex in a few weeks (though I could guess his feelings on it) I’m not interested in continuing the band so it’s over. Whatever, bands break up. Reasons? 1)why do you need any reasons?, 2)any reasons for my not wanting to be in Gin Circus anymore will probably be more interesting twenty years from now if I wrote an autobiography. You can read about it if I ever end up doing that. But I digress.

As part of closing this chapter of my life I’m cleaning out my hard drive of all things Gin Circus related and so I’m going to link the videos and stuff in this post and be done with it.

1. A cover of the Stone Ponies song “Different Drum.” This was taken during rehearsal for our last show. Ignore my self-indulgent hand motions. A song like this has to be sung with a purpose, I think, and I wanted to make sure whatever I did with my hands fit the content of the lyrics. I also overlaid two vocal tracks together to strengthen it so you could hear me over the guitar. No, the fan blowing my hair is not an intentional 80s rock video homage. It was overly hot in that kitchen.



2. Clementine, AKA- the song that never really was. Clementine was the first song we wrote together and it was exciting at the time—we sat in the living room until 1am writing it and even got as far as recording and mixing it for the Gin Circus demo (don't ask me whatever happened to that, its all on Alex's computer, last I knew). It was our Johnny Cash and June Carter song and also the most openly psychotic thing in our performance repertoire. Granted, I was the one who insisted on the Gone With the Wind reference of “I’ll crush your little skull in girl, to get him out of your head.” Whatever. This video has both the rehearsal and the live performance of the song because it shows one of the problems with Gin Circus: in rehearsal, we worked very well together—we joked, interacted, and had some semblance of musical chemistry that made it easier to create a coherent performance. On stage, especially in this video, it just looks like two people who are on the same stage, singing the same song but are in two different mindsets. I feel awkward watching it because, well, it doesn’t work outside of the kitchen. The end.



3. The first attempt at Gin Circus photos. Mozaic photobooth style:


There’s more somewhere but honestly, and forgive my language, fuck it. My final points are: it could’ve been a decent band, but it wasn’t and it probably wasn’t one for a good reason. I have a feeling I’m meant to be solo and considering that the first two Gin Circus shows were booked only because I’d been asked to do solo shows and was too afraid then to do them alone I think that the band was meant to be short lived anyway. I’m more confident now, I can stand on my own, blah blah blah the end. Although I sometimes falter in it, I do try and attempt to never burn bridges, I just don’t travel over those bridges anymore if I don’t want to. But enough metaphors and defending of my choices when no one is even bothered with why I made such choices.

This was Gin Circus when it started:


This is Gin Circus as it ended:


Now, no more about it. Closed due to prohibition. Onto more sobering activities. Enough of my bad puns.

End of August Round-Up; or, Why This Last Week Felt Like it Was a Month Long.

Oh, goodness. I feel like I start every blog entry with “Oh, Goodness,” whether I leave it in or not. This time it’s good, though. The transitional phase I felt I was coming into is actually coming to fruition, which is always nice. I have a lot to write about as a consequence. I’ll try and address all of the points individually but also succinctly because I don’t want to press the limits of those who do read this blog.

----My mother and I have a complex relationship (well, who doesn’t have a complex relationship with their parents?) but one thing that is irrefutable is that she supports me in being my strange little artsy self 100%. An example of this is that this past Friday she gave me her collection of antique coins, 14 silver ingots, and a few old rings and took me to Maine Gold and Silver to sell them to help pay for production of my solo CD. In total, I walked away with $320 to put toward production and considering I had about $20 left from my Gin Circus Band Fund I’m very grateful for that. So, even though she doesn’t read this, thanks mom.

----Things with the Dooryard are really taking off. This new group of people in there that I’m a part of are so motivated to clean the place up and make it functional that the house already looks much more stellar one month after our first meeting than it did in the few months I’d been visiting before I became a part of it. Remember those pictures I posted a while ago of Alex spray painting “R.I.Y.L.” on a wall with blue paint? Well, that wall is in the room where myself and my friend Tessa want to have our art space and honestly the presence of the R.I.Y.L., although I’m sure it was fun to make at the time, was getting on everyone’s nerves. This is because we’re in the middle of readying the house for our upcoming lease renewal and having things like that on an otherwise blank white wall send the wrong impression of what we’re trying to do. So, this Sunday Tessa, Nick, and I painted it over with a cheerful, mustard-y yellow.
This is the final photo of R.I.Y.L. I believe it means “Recommend If You Like,” and I recommend that it be painted over.


Here’s the first coat of paint. The letters still show through because the blue is darker, but we will yet vanquish it:


I also swept down both staircases of the Dooryard House before Tessa arrived. It felt good to see because it produced about two pounds of sand, dirt, and dust bunnies, but was also kind of gross because when I blew my nose after I was done it was as if I’d been working in a coal mine and had caught the black lung. It’s getting into a more orderly, awesome state, though, so I’ll gladly suffer temporary black lung for the sake of a clean art space.

-----I’ve found my first group of friends in my new life. It’s such a horrible, cliché phrase, “my new life,” but considering how severed I feel from the people I knew even two months ago I think it’s fitting. I went to a free show at SPACE one evening and left knowing an awesome set of new friends, one of whom is now my boyfriend. I’m always amazed by how one thing can set off a chain of events. I had met my boyfriend and his friends before, in some cases waaaay before, but I didn’t click in with them until that night. I believe in timing, certainly. I actually met them/him the night of the first Gin Circus show at Geno’s when one of the bands on the bill had to cancel and the band my boyfriend was in was one of two bands who stepped up to fill in for them. Who knows how many times I’d run into him before that and just don’t remember it. He’s friends and roommates with the guys in Huak and I remember them being around for as long as I’ve been hanging out in Portland. Case in point, here’s a picture of me and Jake from about two years ago (I agree with Jake's idea that if I ever play on the same bill as Huak again this should be the image on the flyer):


I think it’s a rule that if Jake and I are in the same photo one of us has to have our face obscured (usually me); por ejemplo, here’s a recent one of him playing w/ Ryan in their “Mark Summers” band with me and Boyfriend Jason looking on from what seems like the VIP section of the show but is just us trying to not be on the receiving end of Ryan’s disturbingly skimpy outfit:

(Photo by Jon Donnell)

------On the music front, I now have my own website and domain name, www.aubinthomas.com . Now, I’m professional. Exciting:

and if you can read the other tab I have up on Opera, yes, I am watching a documentary about child beauty pageants.

I’m also trying to be less serious in my songs. Thanks to a renewed interest in Flight of the Conchords and Garfunkel and Oates I’ve been trying to take a lighter approach to my angsty feelings I need to get out through song. If you’ve not heard of the latter band, I suggest you view some of their very quality videos:

http://garfunkelandoates.com/music/clips/

My favorite is “Pregnant Women Are Smug,” because it’s true, for the most part they are:


I’m off to class now, the last semester of college and all. I’m excited but a bit scared. I don’t want to write about that, though, because it’s boring. More to follow later about other subjects.
-Aubin